Don’t get stuck at the pity-party… 

The other day someone made a comment about why they stopped following another creative business – and what they said really resonated with me.

They said (and I’m paraphrasing here so I don’t call out any business in particular) that they stopped following a particular artist because their business turned from a fun, inspiring person to follow to a self-indulgent pity-party, that has gone on for years, with a bit of their art thrown in for good measure.

That really got me to thinking…

What is the reason we start to follow any artist or creative business?

Becuase they are filling a need you have or they inspire you.

Your business is there to serve and inspire other people.

It needs to be engaging and provide a positive experience for people.

Your business isn’t really about you.

It is about what you offer others.

So if you start getting off of your brand message and sharing things that aren’t really related, you are going to lose the following you have built. People don’t follow you for your opinion on politics, religion, or to hear how bad your life is.

EVERYBODY’S life is hard.

Just not everybody has a platform to shout it out on.

We follow other artists and creatives to give us a brief moment away from our own problems. We don’t want to come to your site or social media pages looking for some inspiration just to start crying over all the blog posts about an illness you or your spouse has had that’s been going on for years, all the problems you might be having with your kids, or to hear you complain… seriously… we come over for escapism, some inspiration, to learn new things, or a brief respite from all the things we have going on… because we all have hard lives.

Not one person on this planet gets by with a free pass on the easy street.

I know it feels good to be able to tell your problems to people and have them sympathize.

It makes you feel that other people care and that you are not alone out there. If you want to let your audience know that things are a bit hard for you at any given moment – then briefly share in one post if you absolutely must…

BUT… then you have to move back onto your artist/business messaging and not continue posting about how bad life is. Don’t get stuck in the pity-party phase – because the longer you stay there… the less people care and the harder it is for you to drag yourself back out of it.

You wear them out.

Their sympathy only goes so far before they think you are just a whiner and your audience starts to drop off. This is true for your own personal profiles also – people only have so much sympathy before they move on. They just don’t want to see it every day from the same person. It gets old.

You might not even notice that you are losing people since the ones that are commenting are coming through a bit louder to you. You might even blame the algorithms when you see your numbers start to drop. It couldn’t possibly be people actually leaving your community because of all of your complaints, could it?

They move onto other creatives who don’t depress them.

They are still out there looking for inspiration and products they need from people who uplift their day.

So I want you to remember… if you have issues that you need to talk about – ask yourself – is it appropriate to post that on your artist/creative business/personal pages and site?

Or do you need to remind yourself to stay on message and find a better forum, friend, therapist or group to hash out the harsh things in life you are going through?

Don’t get stuck at the pity-party.